suave_thomas: (Cute and happy)
Dear Stephie,

Marie and Iccy miss you! )

She also informed her Daddy-Spectre she is going to be a 'big stripper'. I had to hide in the closet (harhar) because my laughter was causing me to be a 'bad influence'. Daddy-Spectre is so straight-edged (harhar) sometimes!
suave_thomas: (In The Cars)
Stephie, Spectre said that you felt I was yelling at you last night. I'm so sorry. I wasn't yelling at you, which is why I said I wasn't angry with you. I had just left Russia and I was just...too emotionally drained to deal with strangers in my house without any explanation. And if Scott was someone who had explained better than, "I'm Scott," as if I should know him, I wouldn't have flipped out so much. Then he refused to hand me Marie and it freaked me out. I came to you because I thought you'd understand I had been through something terrible and then finding some stranger who wouldn't hand me Marie was pretty...emotionally traumatising. I didn't mean to yell, I was just freaking out. And when you yelled back, probably because you were freaking out too. I just couldn't handle it any more and I couldn't stay in the same room if it was going to be an argument. I didn't have the energy.

I'm very sorry, Stephie. And will you tell Scott that now that I'm calmer, I actually appreciate that he didn't hand over Marie. He didn't explain who he was, but neither did I, and the fact that he wouldn't surrender her to someone who barged in and demanded her is...pretty impressive. Even if it did piss me right the fuck off.

Are we okay? I really...I would like to talk to you about Russia. It was shit. I'm at RMMH with Katya until she can leave. She's quite ill. All stuff she will recover from, but it'll take awhile. And I don't want her to be alone because she's been alone for so long.
suave_thomas: (Thomas on the Town!)
I'm still at the hospital. Scarlett and Stephie are awake more often now and I think I might go get us all cake soon! I hope cake doesn't freak them both out... Cake is pretty non-offensive, right? And also sooo good.

I had a long chat with your father. I thanked him for what he did, because when I saw him right afterwards I wasn't much for the talking. And then we chatted about what he said on your journal. He was shocked we both considered it strange because he said he always loved his family and he was surprised this wasn't obvious. We talked about about how people percieve love. I actually had to stop him from ringing you after we had lunch because you would have been in sound check probably. And I'm assuming you'd rather have the conversation when you get back? It'll be okay though, baby. He'll listen to you. I think he wants to listen to you. I said it would be very easy to take his actions as actions not of love but of hate and he got very upset. I think he regrets a great deal.

I hope you don't mind that I talked to him... It's okay, right? Even though asking now is a total cop-out. I just felt it was important to at least bring up to him now, lest he continue to do it and not understand why you don't respond.

I love you. I miss you. You've been gone a day and already I'm all piney. But at least I know you're safe and happy and having the time of your life. That's worth a hell of a lot.

Did Deirdre get you drunk last night?
suave_thomas: (Smile the best)
ok, i'm going to have some yogurt. thomas is like, hovering with happy behind me. he is a freak. he is also probably the most incredible person in the world.

She's not mad at me.
suave_thomas: (To the Future)
Happy Valentine's Day, Sweetheart. You're still okay? And Marie? You don't need anything else? Let me know if you need anything and we'll find some way to get it to you, okay?

I'm home now. I wanted you to know. I'm here. I didn't want you to come here thinking I wasn't and be shocked.
suave_thomas: (To the Future)
Hi there...

Peter told me you're safe somewhere. I uhm...I wanted to say I understand. Needing to leave. I know it's scary. I hate that someone took my face and used it to be amoung the people I love for two weeks. I hate that someone could do that to you again, and making you afraid of me... It makes me so angry. But Stephie, I'm not angry at you. Never.

I changed my passwords and I was trying to think of something that could prove to you that it was me, but the only thing I can think of is that before all of this happenend I was scared because of what happened in the park and Spectre was away and you slept beside me and I wasn't so afraid with you there. I don't know if I could properly explain how much that meant to me. Those quiet moments alone with you...they made me feel safe. I want you to know that thinking of you was one of the things that got me through the last two weeks too. When it was bad...really bad and I needed some memory of happiness to cling to, I thought of jogging with you in the park or seeing you with Marie. Laughing with you and Tasha. You are one of my happy thoughts. I'm lucky to have so many.

I miss you, Stephie. And I miss Marie like part of myself. But you take your time. You need to feel safe too. If there's anything I can do...please. Just ask. Hell, I'll let Deirdre suck part of my soul to prove to you it's me, though I think Deirdre might not like that so much. Josie then. And she could rip my arms off too, if I turned out to be an evil whore.

I'm just me. I'm just Thomas. Thomas who loves you.

June 2011

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