Ruminations of an Afterlife

I've had this journal entry open forever and I can't even think of what to say. To comment on what happened in Dublin...it's impossible.

I'll say this. I love my friend Flynn. That doesn't change. He is still James' godfather and I love him as much as I ever did.

Spectre, Katya, James and I will be back on Tuesday. We love you all.

Hi there...

Peter told me you're safe somewhere. I uhm...I wanted to say I understand. Needing to leave. I know it's scary. I hate that someone took my face and used it to be amoung the people I love for two weeks. I hate that someone could do that to you again, and making you afraid of me... It makes me so angry. But Stephie, I'm not angry at you. Never.

I changed my passwords and I was trying to think of something that could prove to you that it was me, but the only thing I can think of is that before all of this happenend I was scared because of what happened in the park and Spectre was away and you slept beside me and I wasn't so afraid with you there. I don't know if I could properly explain how much that meant to me. Those quiet moments alone with you...they made me feel safe. I want you to know that thinking of you was one of the things that got me through the last two weeks too. When it was bad...really bad and I needed some memory of happiness to cling to, I thought of jogging with you in the park or seeing you with Marie. Laughing with you and Tasha. You are one of my happy thoughts. I'm lucky to have so many.

I miss you, Stephie. And I miss Marie like part of myself. But you take your time. You need to feel safe too. If there's anything I can do...please. Just ask. Hell, I'll let Deirdre suck part of my soul to prove to you it's me, though I think Deirdre might not like that so much. Josie then. And she could rip my arms off too, if I turned out to be an evil whore.

I'm just me. I'm just Thomas. Thomas who loves you.